Stress Management

Stress is part of all of our lives. It is a big part of most of our lives. No matter who you are, there is some stress somewhere. Since we all know what stress is and that it is something that we are familiar with, one would think that it would be easy to handle. Unfortunately, it is not. Stress is very difficult to deal with.
Stress is so difficult to deal with that we often don’t. We simply let stress take over and run our lives, never to be dealt with or even managed. Although common, this is a scary thought to me. Stress makes live hard for many. In fact, stress kills people. It is not an overstatement to call stress deadly.
For that reason, I find it important, not only to discuss stress, but to help people manage it. Notice that I use the word manage. I did not say that I help people “relieve” or “eliminating” stress, or give people “stress-free” lives. Stress comes into all of our lives, no matter how happy, efficient or skilled we are. It does not go away for good. You may not feel it or be worried about it for a while, but that doesn’t mean that it won’t come back.
This is where the real change is made. Many of my clients have made great strides in their lives. Stress, of course is an area that we have worked on. When we start working on this topic, there are some major barriers. There are some people that have been completely consumed by stress. While there are others who don’t feel that it exists at all. For many of these people, no matter where they are on the spectrum, there are a few important steps that take place on the road to managing stress.
It goes back to my earlier statement about managing stress versus “relieving” or “eliminating” of stress. Once you realize that you will never completely eliminate stress, you will be in a much better place mentally. Often, I see people get upset over that fact that they feel stressed. It becomes a battle that they cannot win, especially when they are upset at themselves for feeling stressed at all.
While stress management can be very complicated, it doesn’t have to be. That’s right, managing your stress does not have to be complicated. In fact, it can actually be quite simple. It all comes down to three things. These three things are what allow you to manage your stress:
1. Triggers
2. Control
3. Habits
1. Triggers
What is causing your stress? The triggers are simply the reasons or factors that cause you to feel that your stress level is elevated. By identifying these triggers, we can start to make changes to our routine. Just like any other change, the key is awareness. This awareness is the first step you must take if you want to make a change.
2. Control
What can I control? Now that we have identified the situations or factors behind our stress, we can get more specific in our gameplan. Once we are aware of the causes, we can begin to identify the areas of control. Even if a situation feels completely overwhelming, there are likely many small factors that add up to bring your stress level to its peak. Some of those small areas may be in your control. Even if we can only identify a few of those small areas and control them, that could make a significant difference in the overall stress level.
3. Habits
What do we do when we feel stressed? Habits are a way of life. We all live our lives by practicing habit after habit as we go through our routines. The problem for most people is that their habits are causing more harm than good. That may sound harsh, but it is reality. Our health and wellbeing in the US is in a state of emergency. We are not taking care of ourselves the way we should be. If we can identify the triggers, begin to control the small areas of our lives, good habits are already forming. Once we can do that, it is just a matter of practice. We will get better and better at controlling the areas we can control and doing things that help us feel less stressed.

Now, this may only be temporary, but that is the beauty of habits. The more you practice and live your life a certain way, the better you get at it. Now, this has lead many of us down the path of pain and suffering as we have gotten so good at doing things that brought us harm. Remember, a habit is a habit. There are good habits and there are bad habits, but the fact remains that they are all in the same class. Habits function the same way good or bad. Habits bring you the expected results, good or bad. It is up to you to determine how you want your life to go.

Clearly this applies to many areas of life. Stress, although a more dangerous and difficult topic, is no different. If you identify the triggers, focus on the things you can control and practice habits that help you manage stress, than you will be managing stress. When you manage your stress, you get a feeling of accomplishment and everything feels easier. When you don’t manage your stress you get…more stress!