Exercise is important. We all know it is important. At a young age, we start doing it naturally. Without thinking twice about it, we run and we play as kids. In fact, we usually have to be told to stop. Otherwise we go until we literally can’t go anymore and sleep becomes the next activity. The reason I bring this up is not to say that we get lazy as adults or that we should all quit our jobs and play all day. I bring this up because at one point, exercise was part of everything we did, but now it is something that we have to squeeze in. Or worse, it is something that we don’t have time for.
I don’t have a lot of free time during a typical day or week. Like the rest of us, a great deal of my time is spent on my career. I focus on clients and other aspects of my business for a great majority of my time. My point about that is not to brag about how busy I am, or how I can squeeze exercise in no matter how busy I am. Although that is technically true, there is a better reason for me to bring this to light.
The most important reason I can think about us focusing on our time and fitting in exercise is to see that it is not as dire as we think it is. First of all, when we were kids we loved every minute of activity. Now we look at it as a chore or task to be completed. It is easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle. And it is easy to feel like we have no time at all for anyone or anything. What we need to do is take a step back to look at remember the following points:
- You don’t have to be training for a marathon to be active
- You don’t have to be in the gym to get exercise
- It’s the exercise you enjoy that you will keep doing
Too often we look at our routine and try to find a way to revamp it in one sweeping change. Not only is this overly difficult, but it is also not necessary. Your goal was to do more activity than you did last month, not to make the Olympic team. We think if we can’t do a world-class distance in a record-breaking time that it’s not good enough. The scary part is that when we try and fail, it only gets harder to try it again because of all the negativity.
Once you have these 3 simple points in your head, it will be much easier to make exercise part of your life. Not only will you give yourself a break from the negative thoughts, but you will also start to enjoy the exercise again. Think about it this way: What are you more likely to do tomorrow, something that you fought through and can barley do today, or something that you enjoyed and are looking forward to doing again today? It’s that simple.
So, what is the lesson here? The lesson is, to make exercise part of your life, you only need to remember the following things:
- You don’t have to be training for a marathon to be active
- You don’t have to be in the gym to get exercise
- It’s the exercise you enjoy that you will keep doing
Monday, July 27, 2009
Monday, July 20, 2009
The Importance of Goal Setting
Goal Setting is a habit. We use it in all areas of life. We often discuss goal setting as a good way to make changes and improve health. Goal setting is also important in business, family and any other area that we want a certain result. Generally, we want positive results in all areas of life. Some of us seem to find a way to be successful in multiple areas, while others excel in one area, but struggle in another.
Why is this? I think it is because thy habit of goal setting has not been formed or needs to be practiced more. Let’s take John for example:
John is a talented musician. He plays the piano and has for many years. He has been good at it as long as he can remember and now he earns a living playing. Clearly, John has talent, or he wouldn’t be paid for his music. He is good enough for people to come and watch him perform. Yet, there is a part of John that is not successful. He has struggled with his weight for years too. While he has great skill in one area, he lacks in another. It’s not that he doesn’t know how to lose weight, it’s just that he can’t seem to find the right plan to get him to his desired results.
In fact, it goes beyond that. When John and I started working together, he had a clear passion for his music. He realized that if he didn’t lose weight, he would be putting himself at risk for medical problems as he got older. He also realized that he wanted to change, but hadn’t ever tried much of a serious plan before.
What John needed, was to look at his health like he has looked at his music. When we compared his health to his music career, it was clear to John that he had been setting goals, formed habits and was on a specific plan from years ago. Once he was able to think about the desired results that he set for his career (tickets sold, gigs booked, etc.) it was easy to the importance of having goals. An even bigger light bulb came on when he thought about the habits he had formed throughout his career. Habits like practicing, rest and communication with his manager about promotion, to name a few, were the keys to his success. John realized that without the goals and habits he had developed, not only would he not be able to earn a living as a talented musician, he would not likely be this good if he even played at all!
The lesson John learned was a valuable one. Not only was he able to put some goals on paper and start forming the habits to get him there, he also improved his career. That’s right, the goal setting that became so unconscious around his music became much more directed now that he understood the importance. This lesson was a bigger one for me, as I realized that goal setting in one area can improve another area as well. The fact is, goal setting is a habit. It is valuable in all areas of our lives.
Why is this? I think it is because thy habit of goal setting has not been formed or needs to be practiced more. Let’s take John for example:
John is a talented musician. He plays the piano and has for many years. He has been good at it as long as he can remember and now he earns a living playing. Clearly, John has talent, or he wouldn’t be paid for his music. He is good enough for people to come and watch him perform. Yet, there is a part of John that is not successful. He has struggled with his weight for years too. While he has great skill in one area, he lacks in another. It’s not that he doesn’t know how to lose weight, it’s just that he can’t seem to find the right plan to get him to his desired results.
In fact, it goes beyond that. When John and I started working together, he had a clear passion for his music. He realized that if he didn’t lose weight, he would be putting himself at risk for medical problems as he got older. He also realized that he wanted to change, but hadn’t ever tried much of a serious plan before.
What John needed, was to look at his health like he has looked at his music. When we compared his health to his music career, it was clear to John that he had been setting goals, formed habits and was on a specific plan from years ago. Once he was able to think about the desired results that he set for his career (tickets sold, gigs booked, etc.) it was easy to the importance of having goals. An even bigger light bulb came on when he thought about the habits he had formed throughout his career. Habits like practicing, rest and communication with his manager about promotion, to name a few, were the keys to his success. John realized that without the goals and habits he had developed, not only would he not be able to earn a living as a talented musician, he would not likely be this good if he even played at all!
The lesson John learned was a valuable one. Not only was he able to put some goals on paper and start forming the habits to get him there, he also improved his career. That’s right, the goal setting that became so unconscious around his music became much more directed now that he understood the importance. This lesson was a bigger one for me, as I realized that goal setting in one area can improve another area as well. The fact is, goal setting is a habit. It is valuable in all areas of our lives.
Monday, July 13, 2009
Managing Expectations
We talk about management in many settings. Money management, business management and time management are all very important to our day to day lives. I even stress health management on a daily basis. Management is a key to any game plan, no matter what you are trying to accomplish.
There is another form of management that I want to discuss today. That is managing expectations. The management of our expectations often gets neglected or downright abused. In my opinion, expectations are a big challenge in our lives and management is the biggest challenge of all.
When I say that managing expectations often gets neglected or abused, what I mean is that we don’t do it very well and sometimes we even set ourselves (and others) up for failure. Let’s take a look at some examples to get a better picture of this challenge.
Michael is a client that has a clear list of goals that he wants to make. He wants to quit smoking and start dealing with his stress in other ways. He has done this before, so we start by talking about his past experience. Michael was feeling good after his first week of change. He significantly cut back on smoking. The only problem is that he thought he would be able to quit completely in a week. His expectation was, start tapering down and quit altogether by the end of the first week. Well, it wasn’t that simple with the other things going on in his life. He had other tasks to focus on and when he was at work, the days got very stressful. Naturally, since this was his routine, he smoked and had trouble cutting down as much as he wanted to. The results: Michael was frustrated and started going back in the other direction because he was upset about his “failure”.
Our first conversation made it clear to Michael what the problem was last time. It was not that he couldn’t do it or that he needed something major to take place to help him. It was clear that all he needed to do was manage his expectations.
It sounds simple, but I asked Michael the question:
Would you rather try to run one mile and get two, or would rather try for two and only get one?
In his case, of course, I followed that with: would you rather quit cold turkey today, but be smoking again in a month, or would you want to still be smoking next week, but continue moving toward quitting and be smoke-free next month?
There are many philosophies and goal setting techniques that will give us different conclusions, but the point is that surpassing a goal leaves us feeling better than not reaching one.
The answer for Michael, on the second try, was simple. His expectation was that he would spend a week tapering his cigarettes down. Week two would be spent focusing on his stressors while he stuck with that same number of cigarettes as week one. Once he was clear on what was making him feel stressed and therefore wanting to smoke, he could alter his habits by being alert to those events. Before they happened, he started chewing gum. Now that he had his routine on track, he was feeling confident and ready to start moving forward. The gum helped him continue to lower is smoking each day and eventually (one a two weeks later) he was smoke-free. The best part is that he remained smoke-free since he actually changed his habits rather than just quitting temporarily.
Managing expectations is the difference between quitting because we are frustrated and continuing to move forward. Without managing expectations, not only do we not know what we are capable of, we actually lower our capacity because we defeat ourselves before we even get started. Before you set a goal, be sure that your expectation is realistic.
There is another form of management that I want to discuss today. That is managing expectations. The management of our expectations often gets neglected or downright abused. In my opinion, expectations are a big challenge in our lives and management is the biggest challenge of all.
When I say that managing expectations often gets neglected or abused, what I mean is that we don’t do it very well and sometimes we even set ourselves (and others) up for failure. Let’s take a look at some examples to get a better picture of this challenge.
Michael is a client that has a clear list of goals that he wants to make. He wants to quit smoking and start dealing with his stress in other ways. He has done this before, so we start by talking about his past experience. Michael was feeling good after his first week of change. He significantly cut back on smoking. The only problem is that he thought he would be able to quit completely in a week. His expectation was, start tapering down and quit altogether by the end of the first week. Well, it wasn’t that simple with the other things going on in his life. He had other tasks to focus on and when he was at work, the days got very stressful. Naturally, since this was his routine, he smoked and had trouble cutting down as much as he wanted to. The results: Michael was frustrated and started going back in the other direction because he was upset about his “failure”.
Our first conversation made it clear to Michael what the problem was last time. It was not that he couldn’t do it or that he needed something major to take place to help him. It was clear that all he needed to do was manage his expectations.
It sounds simple, but I asked Michael the question:
Would you rather try to run one mile and get two, or would rather try for two and only get one?
In his case, of course, I followed that with: would you rather quit cold turkey today, but be smoking again in a month, or would you want to still be smoking next week, but continue moving toward quitting and be smoke-free next month?
There are many philosophies and goal setting techniques that will give us different conclusions, but the point is that surpassing a goal leaves us feeling better than not reaching one.
The answer for Michael, on the second try, was simple. His expectation was that he would spend a week tapering his cigarettes down. Week two would be spent focusing on his stressors while he stuck with that same number of cigarettes as week one. Once he was clear on what was making him feel stressed and therefore wanting to smoke, he could alter his habits by being alert to those events. Before they happened, he started chewing gum. Now that he had his routine on track, he was feeling confident and ready to start moving forward. The gum helped him continue to lower is smoking each day and eventually (one a two weeks later) he was smoke-free. The best part is that he remained smoke-free since he actually changed his habits rather than just quitting temporarily.
Managing expectations is the difference between quitting because we are frustrated and continuing to move forward. Without managing expectations, not only do we not know what we are capable of, we actually lower our capacity because we defeat ourselves before we even get started. Before you set a goal, be sure that your expectation is realistic.
Monday, July 6, 2009
The Holidays and Vacation
The holidays can be a very enjoyable time. They can also be a nightmare for someone making lifestyle changes. We’ve all heard tales about Christmas or Thanksgiving being the day that “ruined me” or “derailed” the positive progress that was made leading up to them. It is a classic scenario for someone watching their weight to fear the holidays, vacations and any other special occasion for that matter.
Why are the holidays so tough? Well, for starters, the holidays are already putting us in a tricky position because we build them up so much. We’ve all heard someone say (or said it ourselves): “I wouldn’t normally eat that, but it is the holidays, so I have to.” Or you’ve been told (or been the one telling): “You have to eat this because it’s just not (insert holiday here) without it.”
Which reminds me of the most recent holiday (and inspiration for this week’s article), the 4th of July. We have all been to a gathering where there are assorted grilled meats, potato salads, corn on the cob, apple pie, etc. We’ve all gotten that first whiff off the grill when meal-time was near. We’ve all had the moment of decision as we filled our plates as well. “Should I stop?” “Is that enough?” We ask ourselves these questions, but we just keep piling the food on. Why? Because it’s the holidays and we think we won’t enjoy the day as much if we don’t eat as much as we can.
Now, when I put it that way, you can clearly see the flaw in our logic. In reality, how do we spend the rest of the day? We spend it uncomfortably full, tired and wishing we hadn’t eaten so much! Not to mention the mental game we are playing because we just “undid” everything we had worked for. Why do we know what we want, yet still do the opposite? This is a fascinating thought for me, not only because my clients are dealing with it every day, but because I too have found it to be a challenge.
So what can we do? Well, the 4th of July holiday really made me think this year. I was thinking about our freedom and all of the choices we have now. If we didn’t have these choices, life would not be very fun or fulfilling. But, what we have to remember is that we are free to choose. I feel that as soon as a certain day comes around or a certain option is in front of us, we throw choice right out the window.
I think we do this because we have surrendered to the moment. The holiday that we have been waiting for or the vacation that we are finally on makes us feel like we have to splurge in order to enjoy ourselves. When in reality, we don’t truly enjoy ourselves because we are physically uncomfortable and more significantly, we feel that we have gone against our natural choice in the first place and done something that we quickly regret.
What is the solution? While there are many steps that can be taken to change these habits, the first thing that needs to change is our mindset. The mindset of “doing whatever I can do to sabotage myself and go against the norm will bring me the most enjoyment right now” is clearly not giving us what we want. We may have a short period of enjoyment, but long term and even immediately following, our actions do not bring us the results we want, and therefore we are really letting ourselves down.
The mindset that will help us succeed is this:
Take the vacation, don’t let it take you
Celebrate the holidays with your choices and you will enjoy your results. If you leave it up to chance, you know the possibilities and know how you will feel afterward. When you get away, realize that the choices you make now will impact you now and in the future. We are the same people on vacation that we are at home. There is no way to forget or pretend what happens on a trip and have it somehow not affect us when we return home. Going with a goals and a realistic plan will help you manage the choices you have while still enjoying them, both during and after you make them.
Why are the holidays so tough? Well, for starters, the holidays are already putting us in a tricky position because we build them up so much. We’ve all heard someone say (or said it ourselves): “I wouldn’t normally eat that, but it is the holidays, so I have to.” Or you’ve been told (or been the one telling): “You have to eat this because it’s just not (insert holiday here) without it.”
Which reminds me of the most recent holiday (and inspiration for this week’s article), the 4th of July. We have all been to a gathering where there are assorted grilled meats, potato salads, corn on the cob, apple pie, etc. We’ve all gotten that first whiff off the grill when meal-time was near. We’ve all had the moment of decision as we filled our plates as well. “Should I stop?” “Is that enough?” We ask ourselves these questions, but we just keep piling the food on. Why? Because it’s the holidays and we think we won’t enjoy the day as much if we don’t eat as much as we can.
Now, when I put it that way, you can clearly see the flaw in our logic. In reality, how do we spend the rest of the day? We spend it uncomfortably full, tired and wishing we hadn’t eaten so much! Not to mention the mental game we are playing because we just “undid” everything we had worked for. Why do we know what we want, yet still do the opposite? This is a fascinating thought for me, not only because my clients are dealing with it every day, but because I too have found it to be a challenge.
So what can we do? Well, the 4th of July holiday really made me think this year. I was thinking about our freedom and all of the choices we have now. If we didn’t have these choices, life would not be very fun or fulfilling. But, what we have to remember is that we are free to choose. I feel that as soon as a certain day comes around or a certain option is in front of us, we throw choice right out the window.
I think we do this because we have surrendered to the moment. The holiday that we have been waiting for or the vacation that we are finally on makes us feel like we have to splurge in order to enjoy ourselves. When in reality, we don’t truly enjoy ourselves because we are physically uncomfortable and more significantly, we feel that we have gone against our natural choice in the first place and done something that we quickly regret.
What is the solution? While there are many steps that can be taken to change these habits, the first thing that needs to change is our mindset. The mindset of “doing whatever I can do to sabotage myself and go against the norm will bring me the most enjoyment right now” is clearly not giving us what we want. We may have a short period of enjoyment, but long term and even immediately following, our actions do not bring us the results we want, and therefore we are really letting ourselves down.
The mindset that will help us succeed is this:
Take the vacation, don’t let it take you
Celebrate the holidays with your choices and you will enjoy your results. If you leave it up to chance, you know the possibilities and know how you will feel afterward. When you get away, realize that the choices you make now will impact you now and in the future. We are the same people on vacation that we are at home. There is no way to forget or pretend what happens on a trip and have it somehow not affect us when we return home. Going with a goals and a realistic plan will help you manage the choices you have while still enjoying them, both during and after you make them.
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