It doesn’t take long for a problem to become clear to most people. When a problem arises, it is usually obvious. You can look at a situation and know very quickly that there is something wrong. When that something starts, there is usually no denying that it is there.
Finding a problem is not hard. In fact, we often find more problems than we need to. This is true in all areas of life and it is most certainly true in health. We can find problems day and night in any activity that we are trying to do. Think about a typical day and ask yourself:
How many things could’ve gone better today?
Or
What did I see that I didn’t like?
Or
What happened today that frustrated me, made me angry or embarrassed?
Even these three questions could lead to a list of things on a normal day. We find little things in everyday life that add up and drive us crazy if we don’t manage them. Luckily, we usually get over these things pretty quickly. The little annoyances stay little and we move on. The next little thing that happens is usually associated with the last thing, so there isn’t much of a cumulative affect.
In health, there is a different story. Health is all about the little things. We try to make it about big things like diet and exercise, but it is really about the little things. Health is nothing more than a series of habits. The degree that your health is relates to the habits that you apply on a day to day basis.
When we go about your day and apply these habits, we run into roadblocks and get stuck. We get thrown off track. We don’t keep going because we get frustrated and feel like we can’t make it where we want to go.
As we get deeper into this, it is alreadysounding more and more ridiculous. I am picturing some hilarious situations where people are doing day to day activities, but getting thrown off by typical little things. What if instead of shaking it off and pushing through, they just gave up. What would that look like? What would it look like if…
- Someone walking through the airport got bumped into by another person causing them to drop their bag. The bag is heavy, so it takes some effort to pick up. “Too much effort, I guess I’ll just leave it here.”
- A person driving to work and encountering a traffic delay. They are going to be late for work, so rather than going in late, they get so frustrated that they decide not to go at all. “I can’t make it on time, so I just won’t go.”
- Another person goes to the shower and stubs their toe on the way in. This has happened before and it drives them crazy. It is frustrating and annoying and it hurts. For those reasons, they don’t want to go through this anymore, so they stop going into the shower. “I don’t want to stub my toe, so I won’t go in there anymore.”
These are just three scenarios that come to mind when I think about letting little things get to us. Sure, we complain about the day to day annoyances. Sure we get frustrated. We may even do silly things out of anger. We may let things bother us enough to feel like we are having a bad day. But we never quit. We never quit the day, just because it gets tough.
Why do we quit health? We know that we are going to do certain things during our day. We are going to work, school or events that we have on our calendars. We will be where we need to be for who we need to be there for. We will do everything that is asked of us, day in and day out. Even when things get challenging, we will find a way to keep going.
That is how important our day is. That is our life. All we have is each day. We are on a mission each day to accomplish our tasks and we take great pride in that. The key to health is making sure that it is part of the day. If you quit on a health goal, you are quitting on part of your day. We know what would happen if we quit on all or even part of a day’s tasks. On most days, we would run into serious trouble.
We know that isn’t an option, so we don’t do it. We just need to make health part of that list of “must-do” activities. We have to make health part of the day. We have to make it part of the day so we can’t skip it, pass it by or quit it. Don’t quit on your health by quitting on your day.
Showing posts with label Support. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Support. Show all posts
Monday, June 17, 2013
Wednesday, May 8, 2013
Change Your Actions, Change Results
Change is part of our lives. It always has been and always will be. The only thing that is certain in this life is that things will change. Health is not only changing, but it requires us to change in order to keep it, improve it or simply understand how it is affecting our lives.
No matter how healthy or unhealthy your lifestyle is today, you have experienced change in your routine. It may be on the job, at school, at home, with friends or all of the above. At some point, you had to make changes in order to keep doing things you wanted to do. Change, while it can be painful, is not difficult to acknowledge or understand.
Although we have understood the presence of change, I’m not sure that everyone has truly accepted the fact that they need to change in order to keep moving in the desired direction. Change in health is simple: it is simple: you have a path that you want to go down. As you move down this path, challenges come your way that require you to adjust in order to keep going down that path. If you don’t adjust, you won’t be able to continue. It is like a personal road block. If something is in your way, you have to change course in order to get around that obstacle.
What if we don’t change?
What happens if we choose not to adjust our course? That’s simple. If you are on a road driving and there is a fallen tree blocking the way, you have to make a choice. You can change and go another way, or you can sit and wait for someone to move the fallen tree. You still have two choices, but one is far more reasonable than the other. I don’t know too many people that would sit and wait for someone to move the tree.
Let’s think about it from a personal perspective. If your family is running into a scheduling conflict and there seems to be no way to get one event or another, you have a simple choice to make. You can adjust your schedule and change how your time is allocated, or you can keep doing it the same way and hope the situation magically resolves itself. This sounds a lot like the fallen tree, doesn’t it? If you are waiting for something to magically happen that will change the results, you will be waiting around for a long time and may never see a solution.
How do we change?
Change is a scary word to many people. In fact, many people will continue do things that are clearly not working for them because the fear of change is greater than the problems they are dealing with now. For that reason, they are ok continuing to deal with more and more problems because that feels easier than changing. After a while, they get used to doing things this way, used to dealing with problems and results that are less-than desirable. It eventually feels like there is no alternative.
Let’s be clear: There is always an alternative. There is always something you can do to make your life better. No matter how long you have been doing something, you can always change. No matter how much time you have invested in a process, you can always make it better. When you do, you will see better results.
There is one thing required for solutions to work in your routine. Action needs to be taken. No matter how badly you want that schedule to work out for you and your family, if you don’t change something, you will keep into conflicts. No matter how badly you want to that tree to be out of your way, unless you are willing to act and change course, it will remain in front of you, blocking your way.
What do we need to change?
In order to change, you need to take action. In many cases, it is easy to see that a person is not doing anything to counteract a problem, but in just as many cases there is something being done, action being taken that is actually causing the problem. Either way, you have problems if this is taking place. Doing nothing and doing things that harm your health are equal and often difficult to distinguish.
That is why the key to change is action. Not only do you need to take action, but you need to focus your action on the results you want. There are certain results you are looking for in all areas. If these results are not seen, what happens? Do you simply keep trying to do the same things and expect different results? Do you do nothing and assume that the problem can’t be solved forgo those results?
I hope you don’t do any of the above. I hope you would look at current results, realize that they weren’t the desired results and change action to get different results. That is what successful people do. They change their actions to change their results.
What does this have to do with your health?
Personal health and wellness is change. When you look at your current routine, if you are not as healthy as you want to be, you have likely been out of the habit of doing healthy things or in the habit of doing unhealthy things. The change you need here is simply to start making your actions help your health rather than hurt them. That is what healthy people do. It’s all about changing action to change results.
That is what it takes to change in any area of life. It may take time and it may take some investment, but the alternative is already happening and it is hurting you. Increasing weight and health issues are pretty big tree in the road. Poor energy and lost days are large conflicts in your schedule. So, what should you do?
I hope you will look at your current results, realize that they aren’t the desired results and change action to get different results. That is what successful people do in any area of life. They change their actions to change their results. Are you ready to be successful in health?
No matter how healthy or unhealthy your lifestyle is today, you have experienced change in your routine. It may be on the job, at school, at home, with friends or all of the above. At some point, you had to make changes in order to keep doing things you wanted to do. Change, while it can be painful, is not difficult to acknowledge or understand.
Although we have understood the presence of change, I’m not sure that everyone has truly accepted the fact that they need to change in order to keep moving in the desired direction. Change in health is simple: it is simple: you have a path that you want to go down. As you move down this path, challenges come your way that require you to adjust in order to keep going down that path. If you don’t adjust, you won’t be able to continue. It is like a personal road block. If something is in your way, you have to change course in order to get around that obstacle.
What if we don’t change?
What happens if we choose not to adjust our course? That’s simple. If you are on a road driving and there is a fallen tree blocking the way, you have to make a choice. You can change and go another way, or you can sit and wait for someone to move the fallen tree. You still have two choices, but one is far more reasonable than the other. I don’t know too many people that would sit and wait for someone to move the tree.
Let’s think about it from a personal perspective. If your family is running into a scheduling conflict and there seems to be no way to get one event or another, you have a simple choice to make. You can adjust your schedule and change how your time is allocated, or you can keep doing it the same way and hope the situation magically resolves itself. This sounds a lot like the fallen tree, doesn’t it? If you are waiting for something to magically happen that will change the results, you will be waiting around for a long time and may never see a solution.
How do we change?
Change is a scary word to many people. In fact, many people will continue do things that are clearly not working for them because the fear of change is greater than the problems they are dealing with now. For that reason, they are ok continuing to deal with more and more problems because that feels easier than changing. After a while, they get used to doing things this way, used to dealing with problems and results that are less-than desirable. It eventually feels like there is no alternative.
Let’s be clear: There is always an alternative. There is always something you can do to make your life better. No matter how long you have been doing something, you can always change. No matter how much time you have invested in a process, you can always make it better. When you do, you will see better results.
There is one thing required for solutions to work in your routine. Action needs to be taken. No matter how badly you want that schedule to work out for you and your family, if you don’t change something, you will keep into conflicts. No matter how badly you want to that tree to be out of your way, unless you are willing to act and change course, it will remain in front of you, blocking your way.
What do we need to change?
In order to change, you need to take action. In many cases, it is easy to see that a person is not doing anything to counteract a problem, but in just as many cases there is something being done, action being taken that is actually causing the problem. Either way, you have problems if this is taking place. Doing nothing and doing things that harm your health are equal and often difficult to distinguish.
That is why the key to change is action. Not only do you need to take action, but you need to focus your action on the results you want. There are certain results you are looking for in all areas. If these results are not seen, what happens? Do you simply keep trying to do the same things and expect different results? Do you do nothing and assume that the problem can’t be solved forgo those results?
I hope you don’t do any of the above. I hope you would look at current results, realize that they weren’t the desired results and change action to get different results. That is what successful people do. They change their actions to change their results.
What does this have to do with your health?
Personal health and wellness is change. When you look at your current routine, if you are not as healthy as you want to be, you have likely been out of the habit of doing healthy things or in the habit of doing unhealthy things. The change you need here is simply to start making your actions help your health rather than hurt them. That is what healthy people do. It’s all about changing action to change results.
That is what it takes to change in any area of life. It may take time and it may take some investment, but the alternative is already happening and it is hurting you. Increasing weight and health issues are pretty big tree in the road. Poor energy and lost days are large conflicts in your schedule. So, what should you do?
I hope you will look at your current results, realize that they aren’t the desired results and change action to get different results. That is what successful people do in any area of life. They change their actions to change their results. Are you ready to be successful in health?
Monday, February 25, 2013
Want to Live Healthy: You Can
Living healthy is not easy. The more we see in the media, the more problems seem to be plaguing our country. If you are human, which I think you are if you are reading this, you likely see the problems and may even be experiencing some of them yourself.
Health is not something that comes easy to anyone. There are many people that have made it easy for them, but only after many years of hard work and practice. It may look easy for them now, but they had to build those habits. They had to work their way to where they are now. When you see them in action, it looks easy. It may even be easy for them now, but trust me, it was not easy to start and there are still difficult times for them when it comes to sticking with the routine.
The difference between healthy people and unhealthy people is nothing more than the habits and routines that they have worked on for a long time. Even with new habits, the process is the same for healthy people. They know what it will take to make something stick, so they do it and do it until it is part of their routine.
Unhealthy people look at these people and think that the process is easy for them. They think that it is hard for themselves, but easy for the healthy people and they think that the difference between them and the healthy people is the ease. That is not true. No matter how much you struggle with health, there is a way to do it. You can be successful.
You can also fail. This is not what you want to hear, but failure is always a possibility. If you are trying something new, you can fail. If you are working to include new habits into your routine, you can fail.
Now that we have that out of the way, we can discuss some real solutions. Here are some solutions to help you realize that you can:
Stop Fearing Failure
If you acknowledge that failure is an option, you can get over the fear of failure. The fear of failure is worse than failure itself. The difference between successful and unsuccessful people is that successful people are able to fail and keep going, try again or simply find a better way to do something. There is always another way to do something, so if you fail, simply try again, try something different and you will eventually succeed.
Determine Plan B
If you have another option, failure will be pretty short. The problem with falling short of a goal is that it leaves you feeling like you missed the mark. Well, it’s true. You did miss the mark, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t try again. If you have a plan for getting back on track or a secondary goal that will allow you another option, you can succeed or simply limit the impact of a small failure.
Don’t Expect it to Be Easy
Health is not easy. If you expect it to be easy, you will be disappointed. The most common reason for failure is poorly managed expectations. We’ve all been there. You set out to try something new and expect it to be easy. When we run into one little issue, it is enough to derail us. We didn’t see it coming because we expected it to be easy. Success is not easy and often takes a lot of practice. If you go into it knowing this, you can reach it. If you go into it with the fantasy that it will be easy, reality will quickly catch up to you and failure will not be far behind.
So, what are you goals? What is the new habit you want to make part of your routine? No matter what it is, you can do it. How do I know that without knowing what your habit is or what your routine looks like? I know that you can because it isn’t as hard as you think it is. If you can move forward without fear of failing, have a plan B in place because you know that failure is possible and expect a few challenges along the way, you can do it.
It’s not rocket science. It’s not brain surgery. Health is hard, but it’s not that hard. We can all do it. You don’t have to run marathons or lose a hundred pounds in a week. All you have to do is come up with a simple plan that works for you. Determine what habit you want to improve and go improve it. Notice I said improve and not change, eliminate or create. We already have many habits. If you can improve just one habit gradually, you can make a significant impact on your health.
Can you improve your health? Of course you can. Is it going to be easy, of course it won’t be easy. But no matter what it is you are trying to do, if you are focused on your health and willing to create a realistic plan, you can do it. Trust me, you can.
Health is not something that comes easy to anyone. There are many people that have made it easy for them, but only after many years of hard work and practice. It may look easy for them now, but they had to build those habits. They had to work their way to where they are now. When you see them in action, it looks easy. It may even be easy for them now, but trust me, it was not easy to start and there are still difficult times for them when it comes to sticking with the routine.
The difference between healthy people and unhealthy people is nothing more than the habits and routines that they have worked on for a long time. Even with new habits, the process is the same for healthy people. They know what it will take to make something stick, so they do it and do it until it is part of their routine.
Unhealthy people look at these people and think that the process is easy for them. They think that it is hard for themselves, but easy for the healthy people and they think that the difference between them and the healthy people is the ease. That is not true. No matter how much you struggle with health, there is a way to do it. You can be successful.
You can also fail. This is not what you want to hear, but failure is always a possibility. If you are trying something new, you can fail. If you are working to include new habits into your routine, you can fail.
Now that we have that out of the way, we can discuss some real solutions. Here are some solutions to help you realize that you can:
Stop Fearing Failure
If you acknowledge that failure is an option, you can get over the fear of failure. The fear of failure is worse than failure itself. The difference between successful and unsuccessful people is that successful people are able to fail and keep going, try again or simply find a better way to do something. There is always another way to do something, so if you fail, simply try again, try something different and you will eventually succeed.
Determine Plan B
If you have another option, failure will be pretty short. The problem with falling short of a goal is that it leaves you feeling like you missed the mark. Well, it’s true. You did miss the mark, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t try again. If you have a plan for getting back on track or a secondary goal that will allow you another option, you can succeed or simply limit the impact of a small failure.
Don’t Expect it to Be Easy
Health is not easy. If you expect it to be easy, you will be disappointed. The most common reason for failure is poorly managed expectations. We’ve all been there. You set out to try something new and expect it to be easy. When we run into one little issue, it is enough to derail us. We didn’t see it coming because we expected it to be easy. Success is not easy and often takes a lot of practice. If you go into it knowing this, you can reach it. If you go into it with the fantasy that it will be easy, reality will quickly catch up to you and failure will not be far behind.
So, what are you goals? What is the new habit you want to make part of your routine? No matter what it is, you can do it. How do I know that without knowing what your habit is or what your routine looks like? I know that you can because it isn’t as hard as you think it is. If you can move forward without fear of failing, have a plan B in place because you know that failure is possible and expect a few challenges along the way, you can do it.
It’s not rocket science. It’s not brain surgery. Health is hard, but it’s not that hard. We can all do it. You don’t have to run marathons or lose a hundred pounds in a week. All you have to do is come up with a simple plan that works for you. Determine what habit you want to improve and go improve it. Notice I said improve and not change, eliminate or create. We already have many habits. If you can improve just one habit gradually, you can make a significant impact on your health.
Can you improve your health? Of course you can. Is it going to be easy, of course it won’t be easy. But no matter what it is you are trying to do, if you are focused on your health and willing to create a realistic plan, you can do it. Trust me, you can.
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
Your Health: Are You Playing to Win?
Winning and losing is clear and there is seldom confusion as to which side you are on. When you talk about a sporting event, the winning team is clear and the losing team is clear. In an individual competition, you know who wins and who loses. It is not difficult to understand who is on which side.
Health is something different. You are constantly playing, so there is winning every day and there is even losing every day. You can lose daily and still be healthy. As long as you are able to win more often then you lose, you are still able to live healthy. That is where the trick comes into play. You have to understand that in order to truly live healthy. Many people try to win all day, every day, but it doesn’t work. When it doesn’t work, they quit because they think they lost. That is where the real strategy begins.
Winning vs. Losing
Winning is easy. Winning is getting what you want and doing what you set out to do. Winning makes a day go smoothly. Winning brings you results you want. More accurately, winning is the result you want. You have to play to win in order to win. It sounds simple and even sarcastic, but it’s true. Winning is something we all want, but until we start playing to win and expecting to win, we don’t win and we will never win.
Losing on the other hand, is difficult. Losing is not getting what you want and not being able to do what you set out to do. Losing makes things rough and challenging. Losing doesn’t bring you the results you want and it means that you are getting results that you don’t want. Losing is what we dread and what we hope never happens, but it does happen. Once we realize that losing happens, we can get on with it and keep pushing forward.
Offense
In health, there is offense and defense. Just like a game, there are multiple parts in each game and you have to be able to focus on if you want to win. Just like sports, it is easy to focus on offense. The offensive part of the game is easy and fun. Some people think that exercise is like offense because they like it and it is easy. Others think diet is like offense because they are better at picking and choosing healthy foods. Whatever you think is easier in your healthy routine that is your offense.
Not only is it important to know that it is the side that is easier for you, but you also need to know how to use it to your advantage. When a team is better than another team, they are able to score more points and put themselves into a better position as the game goes on. The team is able to take advantage of each situation and build a lead to ensure that the other team can’t come back. Even if they score more as the game goes on, with a big enough lead, they won’t come back to win. The team that used their offense to build a big lead is able to hold on and win the game.
Defense
Defense is a very important part of any sport and it is certainly an important part of a healthy routine. Defense is not fun. Defense is not glamorous or pretty. Defense is gritty and takes hard work. Defense brings results because it helps you take care of important things. During a game, defense helps you keep the other team from winning. Defense allows you to establish a baseline and keep things close when the other team is on the move. If you can put a solid defensive strategy into place, you can ensure that it never gets too bad. You never get too far behind and are always able to come back when your offense is play again.
Health is really just a balance of offense and defense. If you can take advantage of opportunities to score more points and advance your offense, you can build a lead. If you can keep your defense strong and keep things under control, you can keep the game close until you are ready to go back on offense.
Putting it all together
In order to win in sports, you have to do both. You have to be able to play offense and defense at a high level. The better you are at each, the more likely you are to win each game you play. The same is true in health. You have to be able to manage both sides. The key to remember with health is that you are playing games all day every day. You are playing offense at breakfast, defense after and each time you are making an eating choice or exercising, you have the opportunity to build a lead or defend to prevent falling behind or to protect your lead.
Each day, you have the chance to win or to lose. You are making choices all day that determine whether you are going to win or lose. The choices are not always easy, but the results are clear. When you put in the effort to build you routine in all areas, you are playing to win. Wanting to win is great, but the action of putting your routine together is the key to actually getting there. Are you playing to win?
Health is something different. You are constantly playing, so there is winning every day and there is even losing every day. You can lose daily and still be healthy. As long as you are able to win more often then you lose, you are still able to live healthy. That is where the trick comes into play. You have to understand that in order to truly live healthy. Many people try to win all day, every day, but it doesn’t work. When it doesn’t work, they quit because they think they lost. That is where the real strategy begins.
Winning vs. Losing
Winning is easy. Winning is getting what you want and doing what you set out to do. Winning makes a day go smoothly. Winning brings you results you want. More accurately, winning is the result you want. You have to play to win in order to win. It sounds simple and even sarcastic, but it’s true. Winning is something we all want, but until we start playing to win and expecting to win, we don’t win and we will never win.
Losing on the other hand, is difficult. Losing is not getting what you want and not being able to do what you set out to do. Losing makes things rough and challenging. Losing doesn’t bring you the results you want and it means that you are getting results that you don’t want. Losing is what we dread and what we hope never happens, but it does happen. Once we realize that losing happens, we can get on with it and keep pushing forward.
Offense
In health, there is offense and defense. Just like a game, there are multiple parts in each game and you have to be able to focus on if you want to win. Just like sports, it is easy to focus on offense. The offensive part of the game is easy and fun. Some people think that exercise is like offense because they like it and it is easy. Others think diet is like offense because they are better at picking and choosing healthy foods. Whatever you think is easier in your healthy routine that is your offense.
Not only is it important to know that it is the side that is easier for you, but you also need to know how to use it to your advantage. When a team is better than another team, they are able to score more points and put themselves into a better position as the game goes on. The team is able to take advantage of each situation and build a lead to ensure that the other team can’t come back. Even if they score more as the game goes on, with a big enough lead, they won’t come back to win. The team that used their offense to build a big lead is able to hold on and win the game.
Defense
Defense is a very important part of any sport and it is certainly an important part of a healthy routine. Defense is not fun. Defense is not glamorous or pretty. Defense is gritty and takes hard work. Defense brings results because it helps you take care of important things. During a game, defense helps you keep the other team from winning. Defense allows you to establish a baseline and keep things close when the other team is on the move. If you can put a solid defensive strategy into place, you can ensure that it never gets too bad. You never get too far behind and are always able to come back when your offense is play again.
Health is really just a balance of offense and defense. If you can take advantage of opportunities to score more points and advance your offense, you can build a lead. If you can keep your defense strong and keep things under control, you can keep the game close until you are ready to go back on offense.
Putting it all together
In order to win in sports, you have to do both. You have to be able to play offense and defense at a high level. The better you are at each, the more likely you are to win each game you play. The same is true in health. You have to be able to manage both sides. The key to remember with health is that you are playing games all day every day. You are playing offense at breakfast, defense after and each time you are making an eating choice or exercising, you have the opportunity to build a lead or defend to prevent falling behind or to protect your lead.
Each day, you have the chance to win or to lose. You are making choices all day that determine whether you are going to win or lose. The choices are not always easy, but the results are clear. When you put in the effort to build you routine in all areas, you are playing to win. Wanting to win is great, but the action of putting your routine together is the key to actually getting there. Are you playing to win?
Monday, June 11, 2012
Be a Good Friend to Yourself
Health is a serious matter. We all take it seriously. Even if you are struggling to get started, the matter at hand is serious: You want to do something to improve your life and it is important to you that it gets done. It can be frustrating when you run into challenges. Believe me, I’ve run into my share of challenges on my journey. I have also talked to countless people that are dealing with challenges on a day to day basis.
There is something that is more frustrating than the day to day challenges. There is something that is more frustrating than anything else. What’s worse is that your frustration is only equaled by you lack of progress and defeat. When you are dealing with this, it can be difficult to even continue on your plan.
I have a few questions for you relating to this issue:
- Have you ever had a friend that always told you that you were going to get together?
- Have you ever had that same friend change or cancel plans on you?
- How did that make you feel?
- Did you keep trying to make plans with this person?
These questions are answered by you and only you, so I am making no assumptions about you social life. The only assumptions that I am making are:
1. IF you were dealing with this, it was very frustrating and even hurtful.
2. You weren’t dealing with it very long before you simply quit trying.
It goes without saying that it hurts when someone chooses not to spend time with you. It frustrates us when someone doesn’t make time for you. A friend, family member, spouse, coworker or anyone in your life has the power to hurt us by disrespecting our time and company. They can cause you to feel down and question many things. A true friend wouldn’t do this to you, would they?
Well, are you your own friend? Have you been a good friend to yourself? This question may sound odd, but it is very important to ask it. It is very important for you to ask yourself if you have been a good friend to yourself. Obviously, it is also important to be a good friend to your friends and family, but that is easier than being a good friend to yourself. In fact, most people are ONLY good friends to their friends and continue to neglect themselves.
This brings us to the last question on that list: Did you keep trying to make plans with your friend that wouldn’t stick to your commitments?
Most people that I talk to about this, have said that they didn’t try very long before giving up, and they eventually gave up. Many people also tell me that it taught them a lesson. The lesson to them was that if someone isn’t willing to commit to them, they shouldn’t keep committing. If someone doesn’t have time for you, don’t make time for them.
I will ask again: Are you a good friend to yourself? More accurately, have you been a good friend to yourself? If not, you just went through the same situation with yourself that you did with that rude and disrespectful friend. You kept changing your mind and refusing to commit to take time for you, so eventually, you stopped committing the time and assumed that it wouldn’t happen anyway.
This is called quitting or giving up. It seems to be acceptable because we don’t think it’s hurting anyone else. In fact, in many ways it even feels better to let go and quit trying. Why does this feel good? It feels good because you don’t have to let yourself down anymore. Just as it felt good to take your power back and not let your friend stand you up anymore, it feels good to stop standing yourself up too.
There are two ways to stop standing yourself up:
1. Quit (not recommended)
2. Start being a better friend to yourself
Anyone can quit. Anyone can say that they give up and stop trying. Anyone can neglect themselves and pretend that it feels better. But eventually, you are going to want to get back out there and do it. Eventually, you will decide that you want to be friends again. It works with the other person or yourself. If a really close friend or a sibling changes and wants to start trying to build your relationship again, you are likely to give them another chance. Once you decide that you want to start building routine again, you will give yourself another chance.
At least I hope you will give yourself another chance. If you don’t, life will be long and painful. The benefits of health are numerous. You will live a better life with health, just as you will live a better life with friends and family that love you. No one can deny that it hurts to have someone that isn’t willing to commit to you.
That is why living an unhealthy lifestyle is hurting you. Not only are you missing the benefits a healthy lifestyle, but you are also treating yourself badly. You are mistreating yourself physically by not exercising or watching your eating habits. That is one thing. The more significant damage is done on the emotional side. You are mistreating yourself emotionally by refusing to commit.
Hurtful when it comes from a so-called friend: They are refusing to commit time with you. They are putting other things in front of you and your relationship. They are telling you that you are not important enough to spend a little time with.
More hurtful when it comes from you: You are refusing to commit time for yourself. You are putting other things in front of yourself. You are telling yourself that you are not important enough to spend a little time with.
I don’t see much difference between the two situations. The actions are the same.
The results are the same. If you don’t take time for someone, it hurts them. If you don’t take time for yourself, it hurts you. When you think about your health, think about your feelings. Think about how are treating yourself. Ask yourself: Would I tolerate this treatment from someone else? Are you being a good friend to yourself?
There is something that is more frustrating than the day to day challenges. There is something that is more frustrating than anything else. What’s worse is that your frustration is only equaled by you lack of progress and defeat. When you are dealing with this, it can be difficult to even continue on your plan.
I have a few questions for you relating to this issue:
- Have you ever had a friend that always told you that you were going to get together?
- Have you ever had that same friend change or cancel plans on you?
- How did that make you feel?
- Did you keep trying to make plans with this person?
These questions are answered by you and only you, so I am making no assumptions about you social life. The only assumptions that I am making are:
1. IF you were dealing with this, it was very frustrating and even hurtful.
2. You weren’t dealing with it very long before you simply quit trying.
It goes without saying that it hurts when someone chooses not to spend time with you. It frustrates us when someone doesn’t make time for you. A friend, family member, spouse, coworker or anyone in your life has the power to hurt us by disrespecting our time and company. They can cause you to feel down and question many things. A true friend wouldn’t do this to you, would they?
Well, are you your own friend? Have you been a good friend to yourself? This question may sound odd, but it is very important to ask it. It is very important for you to ask yourself if you have been a good friend to yourself. Obviously, it is also important to be a good friend to your friends and family, but that is easier than being a good friend to yourself. In fact, most people are ONLY good friends to their friends and continue to neglect themselves.
This brings us to the last question on that list: Did you keep trying to make plans with your friend that wouldn’t stick to your commitments?
Most people that I talk to about this, have said that they didn’t try very long before giving up, and they eventually gave up. Many people also tell me that it taught them a lesson. The lesson to them was that if someone isn’t willing to commit to them, they shouldn’t keep committing. If someone doesn’t have time for you, don’t make time for them.
I will ask again: Are you a good friend to yourself? More accurately, have you been a good friend to yourself? If not, you just went through the same situation with yourself that you did with that rude and disrespectful friend. You kept changing your mind and refusing to commit to take time for you, so eventually, you stopped committing the time and assumed that it wouldn’t happen anyway.
This is called quitting or giving up. It seems to be acceptable because we don’t think it’s hurting anyone else. In fact, in many ways it even feels better to let go and quit trying. Why does this feel good? It feels good because you don’t have to let yourself down anymore. Just as it felt good to take your power back and not let your friend stand you up anymore, it feels good to stop standing yourself up too.
There are two ways to stop standing yourself up:
1. Quit (not recommended)
2. Start being a better friend to yourself
Anyone can quit. Anyone can say that they give up and stop trying. Anyone can neglect themselves and pretend that it feels better. But eventually, you are going to want to get back out there and do it. Eventually, you will decide that you want to be friends again. It works with the other person or yourself. If a really close friend or a sibling changes and wants to start trying to build your relationship again, you are likely to give them another chance. Once you decide that you want to start building routine again, you will give yourself another chance.
At least I hope you will give yourself another chance. If you don’t, life will be long and painful. The benefits of health are numerous. You will live a better life with health, just as you will live a better life with friends and family that love you. No one can deny that it hurts to have someone that isn’t willing to commit to you.
That is why living an unhealthy lifestyle is hurting you. Not only are you missing the benefits a healthy lifestyle, but you are also treating yourself badly. You are mistreating yourself physically by not exercising or watching your eating habits. That is one thing. The more significant damage is done on the emotional side. You are mistreating yourself emotionally by refusing to commit.
Hurtful when it comes from a so-called friend: They are refusing to commit time with you. They are putting other things in front of you and your relationship. They are telling you that you are not important enough to spend a little time with.
More hurtful when it comes from you: You are refusing to commit time for yourself. You are putting other things in front of yourself. You are telling yourself that you are not important enough to spend a little time with.
I don’t see much difference between the two situations. The actions are the same.
The results are the same. If you don’t take time for someone, it hurts them. If you don’t take time for yourself, it hurts you. When you think about your health, think about your feelings. Think about how are treating yourself. Ask yourself: Would I tolerate this treatment from someone else? Are you being a good friend to yourself?
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