Trying vs. Doing

We’ve all been in a conversation (with someone else or internally) where we say we will try to complete a task. We also know what the word try means. Trying is not doing. We try to find time for things we don’t want to do. More accurately in health, we try to do things we want to do, but don’t think we are able to do. We try to make it to places we don’t want to go and we try not end up doing things we don’t want to do. What happens when we try to do things? Well, often they don’t get done.

Why don’t we get things done when we try? The biggest reason was already stated: trying is not doing. Trying doesn’t work because it has built in doubt. When you say you are going to try something, you are implying that it isn’t going to be easy or natural. You are building in the expectation that it may not happen. When you start something thinking about how it may not happen, guess what, it may not and usually does not happen.

I hear this scenario a lot with exercise, diet, smoking and a long list of other changes that people want to make in their lives. We all want to be healthy and do things that will help us be healthy. Whether you want to exercise more, eat different foods or any other healthy change, you know what it feels like. Hopefully you are doing these things and not just trying to do them.

These are all things we “want” to do, so it is funny to me that we keep trying to do them as opposed to just doing them. It’s funny because we continually tell ourselves that that we are trying or we are going to try. If we are just trying, we are simply saying that we don’t really want to do it or don’t think it will happen.

Think about it with your friends and a social gathering. When someone is “going to try to stop by” are you waiting for them as if they said “YES, I’m coming”? No way. You are more likely to assume they are not coming. We hear the word try and the tone of their excuse and assume that they will not be coming. Not that trying means they automatically won’t come. If they do it will be a bonus, but we don’t expect them to come.

It’s the same thing when we do it to ourselves. When we say we are trying to do something that we want to do, we are just hoping we can do it. We are not planning to do it or better yet…doing it. Therefore, when something doesn’t get done, we already have the excuse ready: “oh well, I’ll try that again later”.

We’ve discussed the importance of habits before and likely will again. Trying can become a habit. When that happens, it only gets more difficult to stop trying and start doing. If you are already in the habit of trying, you can still change this. It often starts by taking a look at your routine. Whether we are talking about your health, work, relationships or any other area, you know whether you are doing what you want to be doing.

How does your routine look? When you think about what you want to be doing, are you actually doing it or are you just trying to do it?